Love (creation) part 2.

So now, what’s next? I’m looking forward to meeting my Love. And I’m expecting him for the month of December 🙂 I’ll share something with you now. 

From NLP: “In order to have, you have to do.

Before you do, you have to be.

In order to be, you have to act as if you are.”

And you can use it for anything! I will try it now for my love life. I intend to meet somebody in December (preferably before Christmas :), otherwise I’ll spend it alone again, I mean seriously without anybody around me. My family is in my home country…).

So, how does it look like. Going from the end, act as if… How do I act as if I had a boyfriend (I mean a matching one)? For example, I focus on my eating, not feeding myself in the evenings when I shouldn’t, taking care of my look, and whenever I can I think and feel that I have a boyfriend already. Well, I’m sure, you too can certainly remember a time when you were in a good relationship, can’t you? How did you think throughout the day when you were in love? Dressing up well to be pretty/good looking for the partner, eating a bit more healthily and sporting to be good looking, saving some money to be able to afford presents to your partner, we all have these kind of thoughts don’t we? So, I have started to think this way, as if I already was in a relationship. With these affirmations, I will certainly start feeling it inside as well. I mean, after thinking it, you have to truly believe and feel this way. (now you may say, it’s just convincing yourself about something that doesn’t exist. I say: doesn’t matter! It will happen if you don’t just convince but you believe! Do you know who is Thomas Edison? Light bulb invention? How did he do it? He was creating something over a time that didn’t exist yet, but he knew and felt what he was going to create it.) So.

We are thinking and feeling human beings. So, if I’m thinking and feeling that I’m in a perfect relationship, I am that kind of human being!

Going forward, “you have to do”. I will go out there, where people are. If you stay where you are, you will get what you can find there. So out of the house! Go for a walk, to the gym, to a course, to a club, to a houseparty, anywhere! But mainly visit those places where the most likely you will find your perfect match. It’s useful to have a list of all the inner and outside qualities that you would like your partner to have. Write a list about everything that is important for you of your perfect match (be honest and realistic as well), what type of job they should be involved in (do you like the entrepreneur type of person, or somebody with a certain 8 hour job..), what sort of mindset should they have, attitude to sports, to kids, to eating, to money, to travelling, anything that would be important for you. Whenever you can, write in a positive way, not like “isn’t smoking” or “doesn’t like playing football”, instead write “non-smoker” and “loves individual sports”. Also, as you know already from the 6 steps of Goal setting, write in a continuous present tense. He is… She is… One more thing, ask and answer the question to yourself: “What sort of person I should become to attract my perfect match?” (this is an important part! If you are not that person who your future partner would be attracted to or be interested in, then the first thing is the inner change! First thing is to be ready for the partner you are expecting.)

After you have done this, you will have a precise picture of what you really want. 

If you think about it, with all these criteria you save time and energy for yourself! Spending months or years with people who you don’t want to be around.. It is not something you want, is it? So, trust destiny and yourself. Maybe you will be singe for a while, or have a few dates, but at least you won’t be involved deeply in future-less relationships. So if you leave that time for yourself, your personal growth and improvement, you’ll end up with a more content and balanced life without having somebody who do not contribute to these. My humble opinion is that it is still better to be single and building up your own life, than to stuck ourselves into an unfulfilling relationship.

Everything that I’m teaching you right now is being tested by me 🙂 But, no place for doubt!

The thing is that since I started this “love creation” thing, things have accelerated a bit. Wherever I am, there are boys who find me and become interested in me. Due to my list, even if I appreciate their initiative, I gently have to say no. You can attract a lot of people, but it does not mean you want to date all of them. Even some of the seemingly matching ones would get afraid of a person’s confidence, and “put the rabbit shoes on” (Hungarian saying :)). It does not matter either. At the end, there will be one who wants to stay. That is going to be the one! Don’t worry about the others, they are not ready yet…

I took me a few weeks to sit down and write these lines. But the time has arrived. It is a long post, written through 3 nights. And I am sharing it because this is what I am here for. I know many of you have exactly the same stuff going on. So I’m here with this not only to talk about it, but as always, to provide possible solutions. Also, this is life. This is happening. And if nobody wants to talk honestly, clearly and openly about these things, than I will. Life is still a game and fun, but it will end one day and becomes only history, so I want to give meaning to everything that I do, as well as I take responsibility for everything I do and ever accomplish. 

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